Forcing Accountability

Yesterday was one of those days that I had a hundred things to do and only a few hours to do them.  I had to give final approval of an ePub I was wrapping up, package and send out exhibition Blurays and posters to film festivals that I have been invited to and finish a video job I was editing, all before heading into NYC to moderate a panel discussion on video for the NYC chapter of ASMP.  My mom used to say, “If you want something done – ask a busy person”.  I never did understand that when I was younger but I know now, that the busier I am – the better I am with utilizing my time.

I was also fine-tuning the presentation that I was going to be giving to the students at Brooks Institute next week. As an alumna of Brooks,

Gail Mooney as a student at Brooks Institute
© Chad Weckler

I was honored when I was asked to speak. I was also taking this responsibility seriously and I was getting a bit stressed over it, which is uncharacteristic for me.  I’m usually very comfortable with public speaking.  I knew I wanted to talk about the value of “community” and how being part of the ASMP has played into that, but I didn’t want to sound “canned”.  I knew that I needed to personalize that message and really boil it down to what that has meant to me.  But I also knew I needed to come off as someone who is still relevant and not be perceived by the students as just someone whose their mother’s age. I needed to show my spirit inside that hasn’t aged at all since graduating from Brooks all those years ago.  I knew I needed to put myself in their shoes and see through their eyes in order to really connect with them. I started thinking in terms of what I know now and what I wished I had known back when I was a student at Brooks.

So, as I headed into NYC, I had a lot going through my mind.  The ASMP event was great.  It was a packed room with an engaged audience and terrific panelists.  But the best part of the evening was the networking after the event.  That’s where the real sharing of information happens and a sense of community is felt.  It’s easy to get disconnected these days from the human connection because we all spend so much (too much) time online.  That human connection will never be replaced by technology. That was one thing I wanted to point out to the students when I talked to them next week – to physically get “out there”.

I got home late and woke up early and needed a good jolt of coffee while I checked my emails.  One email jumped out at me. It was a newsletter from Jonathan Fields who I started subscribing to after hearing Jonathan speak at the World Domination Summit this summer.   The newsletter had a link to a video of Jonathan interviewing, Chris Guillebeau the founder of the World Domination Summit.  Chris writes a blog that I follow, called the Art of Non-Conformity.  As I listened to the interview, it became clearer as far as what I wanted to say to the students in my presentation next week. Chris said one thing that was right on target.  He was talking about pursuing an idea and he said that by putting your idea out to the world – by telling someone about it – you were in fact “forcing accountability”.

I thought back to when I first had the crazy notion of traveling around the world with the purpose of creating a feature documentary about individuals on six continents who were making a positive difference in our world.  The idea had been tossing around in my head for months before I told anyone.  Then one evening as I was walking back from dinner with fellow ASMP board member, Blake Discher, I decided to put the idea “out there”.  It was something I did on impulse, but as I look back on it now, Blake was probably the right one to “test run” this crazy idea on.  He responded with an affirming, “thumbs up”, but not overly exuberant, which was exactly what I needed. Blake is a very grounded person, so for someone like him to not look at me and tell me that I was out of my mind, was the nudge I needed.  So, it was that short, impulsive, casual conversation that forced me to be accountable with my idea.

I went on to make the movie that I set out to make and even better, I got to share the experience with my daughter Erin.  It has changed both of our lives for the better.  That’s not to say that everything has worked out in ways that I may have wanted or thought I wanted.  But it has been a journey that I was meant to take. I have met people that I never would have met in the process and that in turn has led to so many more incredible experiences and adventures that I couldn’t have possibly imagined.

I started thinking about my life’s journey and all the things I have learned since my days as a student at Brooks.  And then I thought,  “what if I knew then what I know now? “  The thing is, if I had already known all those things back when I was a student, I never would have had the journey that I’ve had.  Everything happens in its own time and when it is meant to happen.  And that’s what life’s all about – the journey along the way and that only happens when we leave room for the unexpected.

Saying Goodbye to a Friend and Colleague

Today the photo world is mourning the loss of Susan Carr.  Susan died yesterday after her long battle with cancer.

Susan was perhaps the strongest woman I have ever known.  She was also the most giving.  She gave above and beyond, everything and anything she put her mind to. She tirelessly gave to ASMP (American Society of Media Photographers) and many of her colleagues will attest to that.  But I will remember Susan beyond her work for ASMP  I will remember Susan for her positive spirit.

One fond memory I have of Susan is the day my daughter, Erin graduated from Northwestern University.  My husband, Tom and I were the only “family” members to attend Erin’s graduation because most of our family lives on the East Coast and Chicago isn’t exactly around the corner.  We were going to have a nice, but simple celebration lunch and I called Susan and asked if she would like to join us.  She happily accepted our invitation and was humbled to be included in our celebration. Her presence that day was so joyful and she made the day even more special.  She was part of our family that day and she helped us celebrate one of life’s wonderful moments.

Susan and I didn’t always agree, but we always had the utmost respect for one another.  We were both women in a business that was dominated by men – at least that’s how it was when we first started out in our careers.  That’s changed over the years as more women have entered into the business of photography, but back then – you had to be a strong woman to compete in what was then, a “man’s world.”

But as strong as Susan was, she also had a heart of gold and a deeply intuitive nature. You could see that in her work. Her ongoing project, photographing people’s environments, really showed her spirit to be true.  She gave her still images of these environments  a “voice”,  even though there was no sound. Even when no people were present in her photographs, you could hear and feel the inhabitants of the environments that she selected to shoot.  She leaves behind a wonderful legacy with her work and a testament to the time she lived in.

I will miss Susan in many ways, but mostly in how she encouraged me.  When I first started giving seminars and had a few bumps with some negative feedback, Susan had faith in me. She supported me  and gave me helpful advice that was right on target and just what I needed.  She was also a big supporter of my film, in many ways.  On September 20th, Opening Our Eyes will screen at Valencia College in Orlando, FL as part of a celebration for International Peace Day and The Global Peace Film Festival.  After the screening, the students will congregate outside and make a human peace sign – each one bearing a lit candle.  Those candles will be for you Susan – your life on Earth was far too short but you burned so brightly while you were with us and you will always be remembered.

“To find your calling is a gift.  A purpose provides the drive to pursue
excellence along with an unwavering belief that your work is of value.
When you can take this resolve and turn it into a vocation you achieve
a rare and extraordinary feat.”

~ Susan Carr, “The Art and Business of Photography”