Competing With Yourself

I started writing this blog a couple of days after I got to New Zealand. Now I am in the airport lounge waiting for my departure after an incredible 16 days in this country.

When I began this post, I had just won the Bronze award for Travel Photographer of the Year at the SATW (Society of American Travel Writers) convention in Wellington, New Zealand. I was up against some pretty stiff competition from some of the best travel photographers in the world, so it was an honor that I greatly appreciated.

On the last evening of the convention, they announced the winners of the Photographer Shootout that had taken place the first 3 days of the trip. The starting point was the Auckland airport where all the photographers involved were given their own vehicle – each identical in every way so as not to give anyone an unfair advantage. You could make your own itinerary and go anywhere you wanted to on the North Island – as long as you returned the car in Wellington – 3 days later by 5PM.

The weather was mixed as it usually is during springtime in most countries. We had some clouds, some sun and one morning of hard rain. One of the challenges of course was driving on the left side but that wasn’t as frustrating as the lack of a “shoulder” along the road to pull off to when I saw a magnificent sight – which was just about every 5 minutes. The distances were deceiving and invariably I had twice as much on my itinerary that I ended up getting to.

When I finally returned the car, I was happy to be rid of it – weary of the winding roads that were quite challenging at times. I felt good about the photos I had captured – but not overwhelmed by them because there were so many that I knew I had missed. When they announced that I had won second place silver portfolio – I was surprised and delighted because it had been so challenging for me on many levels. I’m mostly a people and city photographer, so in a country that’s known more for their scenery than large population centers – I was constantly pushing myself out of my norm.

I think that is why the shoot out reward is particularly meaningful to me. I wasn’t trying to beat out my competition and in fact I didn’t feel like someone else needed to lose in order for me to win. I felt good that I had pushed myself out of my comfort zone and every time I have done that, I have been richly rewarded. It was nice to be recognized by my peers and it was nice to win a prize but the best part of all was the feeling that I gave myself. I succeeded in what I had set out to do and that was to try something new and face some trepidations.

The older I get I realize that it’s all about the journey – not the destination.

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Burning Bridges

I used to have a friend who would tell me that my life was made up of circles, each one completing the ring like segments of my life.  The truth is that’s not unique to me – that’s life in general.

It’s Photo Plus Expo week in New York City, when photographers from around the world gather at Javits to look at new gear, take part in seminars and network.  I don’t think I have missed an Expo since they began over 30 years ago. A lot has changed in the photography business over the past 30 years, but one thing is for certain and that is – it’s a very small world as far as the people who are part of this business.

Last night, I went to a couple of parties where I ran into quite a few people that I’ve met over the span of my career.  Some I had done commissioned assignments for, some I had met through seminars that I had given and some were just old friends that I hadn’t seen in a very long time.  But a couple of folks who approached me last night, and struck up a conversation, were people who had totally blown me off in years past – people who had simply ignored me.  In every instance, these had been people who had recently experienced a shift in their own lives and now had a sudden interest in me and in what I was doing – to further their own gain.

I know that I have burned a few bridges in my lifetime and I’m sure there are some I’m not even aware of. (Anyone who tells you that they haven’t burned bridge is just simply not aware.)  Some of those bridges, I have tried to rebuild and have succeeded. and some were beyond repair.  What I have learned – and wish I had learned 20 years ago – is that everything comes around in your life, no matter how much you have grown or changed – the past is always present. And it seems easier sometimes to change the past – but of course that’s not possible.

What I’m finding now is that due to profound changes in the photography business as well as the lingering lousy economy, that the same people, who had ignored me or dismissed me a few years ago, were now acting like my “best friend”.  I’m sure they didn’t remember how dismissive they had been to me – in fact I doubt that I was even on their radar at the time.  But circumstances had changed in their lives and now they were taking notice of me and even asking for my help. I suppose I could say that they had burned a bridge with me but then again in most of these situations there had never been a bridge to burn to begin with.

The point is, you never know how your past will affect your future.  You may think that you are in a position where you have no need for certain people in your life and be dismissive.  But nothing lasts forever and if there is anything that I’ve learned by getting older – it’s just that.  Our lives are made up of circles, each one connecting our past with our future.  Consider that when dealing with people who come in and out of your life – because nothing ever stays the same.  Many times you’ll find out that those people that you thought  you had no use for in your past – may be key in your future.   Hindsight is the best sight and you always get the best light from a burning bridge.

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What to do When in a Slump

There are all types of slumps – creative, financial, relationship and personal. I’m sure there are others, but those are what come to mind – I’ve experienced all of them. I think that comes with living the kind of life I lead. There are times when it seems like I’m on a never ending roller coaster ride with lots of ups and lots of downs. The one thing I try to do when I’m in whatever kind of slump I’m experiencing,  is to focus on the areas that seem to be working in my life.  I’ve learned to take the bitter with the sweet.

Here’s some other remedies I have found that help get me out of a slump:

  • GET OUT – I mean that literally as well as figuratively. I break the pattern of what I am doing that doesn’t seem to be working and “get out” of that place. I also literally – get out – I change my environs – I get together with friends.
  • TRY SOMETHING NEW – I do something that I may have been thinking about, but I usually talk myself out of with every rational reason I shouldn’t do it. So, I follow my irrational instincts.
  • WALK AWAY – This is especially true when you are dealing with something technical and you just don’t “get it”. There have been days when I have struggled with something that wasn’t working – like when editing in Final Cut Pro – and I need to give myself some time away from the problem. But this only works if you aren’t up against a tight deadline. I try not to force a learning curve into situations with tight deadlines.
  •  FOCUS ON WHAT IS GOING RIGHT – There is always something to be grateful for – focus on that.
  • BE STILL – I think this is perhaps the most important remedy that I have learned to embrace and that is – to give something time and not  force it. If something is meant to happen then it will – and in its own time.

Every one of these “remedies” is pretty much centered around the same thing,  and that is to recognize that there will always be slumps in one way or another – but they will make those sweet times that much sweeter.

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Being Yourself

Yesterday, I gave a talk and showed a bit of my film, Opening Our Eyes,

Movie poster for Opening Our Eyes

at the PACA conference in New York City.  I had been asked by ASPP to speak about the making of the film and my plans for distribution.  To tell you the truth, even though I’m always thrilled to show and/or talk about the film, I was a bit nervous with this crowd.  PACA stands for the Picture Archive Council of America and its member include some of the biggest stock photo agencies in the world, including Getty, Corbis, Masterfile and Alamy. I was nervous because part of my message was that I no longer needed the validation or others to get my stories to market.

I thought my message would be somewhat threatening, because I was telling the audience that content creators no longer needed the traditional gatekeepers of the past, to get their stories “out there.”  That because of technology, it was possible for the individual to have a global reach and if one is willing to do the work – the prize is all theirs – meaning the monetary rewards.

I had a tough time slot to speak – right after lunch  –  I knew that I would be dimming the lights for the film and that is never a good thing to do in that time slot.  But, Tom Kennedy had given his very inspirational talk about new media and new opportunities in the  marketplace.  I had heard Tom’s talk  as part of ASMP’s SB 3 series this past year – and I knew that my presentation was a great follow up to his – and in fact it was almost like a case study example of what Tom was talking about.

My presentation went amazingly well and as I looked out into the dimly lit audience as the film was playing – I couldn’t see any closed eyes.  I felt that I made a connection, and that perhaps in some small way, I had made a difference.  Maybe, I just got people thinking about what they could do to make a difference in their own lives.  And maybe I had influence beyond that.  But, I know that I stayed true to myself.  My intent was not to come off as threatening  – but I did want to make people feel a tiny bit uncomfortable.  It’s when we get uncomfortable that we push ourselves to a better place.

My message was simple.  Someone doesn’t need to lose – in order for someone else to win.

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Women and Photography

I have to get something “off my chest”, so forgive this mild rant.

Yesterday, I attended a conference in NYC.  It was a trade show geared to video production with an educational track.  I was sitting in on one session and there were only a handful of people in the room – I’d say less than 10.  I was the only woman in the room. The instructor went to each person in the classroom and asked them what they wanted to learn from his workshop.  He went to everyone in the room – but me!

I was sitting next to my partner, who is also my husband.  I suppose the instructor decided that he didn’t need to ask ME that question. I didn’t count.  Maybe because we were together and he felt that he only needed to ask one of us.  But if so, why not ask me? I felt invisible. It was an all too familiar feeling that I have had in my 35-year career as a photographer and now a filmmaker. But I couldn’t believe that I was still feeling invisible after all that I’ve accomplished in those 35 years.

When I started my career in photography, it was definitely a man’s world.  I was one of six women at Brooks Institute and the only woman in my graduating class.  I fell in love with a “Brookie” and we headed back East to make our fame and fortune in photography.
We’ve done a lot of jobs together over our 35-year partnership and we’ve done a lot on our own.  I needed to do my solo gigs because I felt I had to prove to myself that I could deliver the “story” or the task on my own.  When I worked with my partner, it was always assumed by the client or our peers that I was the rep for my partner – never the photographer.  People have always asked us why we refer to each other as partners rather than husband and wife – that’s why.

Perhaps that’s why I try so hard – but then again maybe that’s just my nature.  And maybe because I always give it my all, I can’t help but be surprised when I’m treated like I’m invisible.  At this point in my life, I can either let it bother me or I can think about who I am and what I’ve done and contributed to my profession.  I focus on that and I take every opportunity to share and talk to young people – women and men.

The irony is, in photo schools these days the women far outnumber the men, yet there are still instructors out there like the one that I encountered yesterday.  I have to ask myself why? I do know that in giving seminars over the last two years for ASMP, I would consistently get comments from women telling me how refreshing it was to have a woman teaching tech.  But they also told me that I wasn’t intimidating like some male teachers they’ve had.

So what’s the point?

I only have one point and that is don’t hire me because you need to fill the slot with a “female” – hire me based on what I’ve accomplished.  Hire me for who I am.  Think past the gender and teach your children well.

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Happy Birthday John and Jackson and Goodbye Steve

Today John Lennon would have turned 71 years old, had his life not been snuffed out by a man with a gun in New York City over 30 years ago.  John was always someone I revered – in the beginning as a heartthrob – later as an activist for peace and for living his life the way he wanted to live it  – despite what others thought.

Today is also singer/songwriter Jackson Browne’s birthday.  His music and lyrics have resonated with me since I first became acquainted with his songs back in the early 70’s when I was living out in California. I’ve been in and out of touch with his music over the years, but recently I’ve been influenced by his songs as well as his social activism. Jackson uses his craft to create awareness, gets people to think and moves  people to action.

Jackson Browne

A line from his song “Alive in the World” inspired the title of my documentary Opening Our Eyes, and I have been extremely fortunate to obtain his permission to use his song in our movie for community screenings and film festivals.  Next week, I will get the opportunity to personally thank Jackson when I get to meet him after his concert at the Wellmont Theater in Montclair, NJ.

Last week we lost one of the “great ones” – Steve Jobs. 

Steve Jobs

I’ve always admired Jobs for his vision and for what he brought into all of our lives.  But mostly I admire Jobs for remembering to “Stay hungry and foolish”. And for reminding us to march to our own tune.  He sums it up more eloquently than I in his 2005 Stanford University commencement speech:

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

I admire these three men for  listening to their hearts and for following their dreams – for daring to be different. They have made our world a better place and have inspired me to do the same.  I don’t know how much more time I have on this earth, but I do know that I wake up each day and remind myself to make it count.

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Resources, Sharing and Good Karma

I love the time we are living in.  If there is anything I want to find out about – and I do mean anything – and I can get “connected” online – I have access to a universe of information. For someone like me who always has a hundred questions running through my mind – it’s like the “time of Aquarius” – only better.

This morning I was poking around ASMP’s CameraCake, a cool new social bookmarking site.  It’s kind of like getting references to all sorts of interesting people, ideas and services from your colleagues. I posted a link to a great new online magazine that I had heard about from friend, David Sanger on Facebook.

So, now that information and link to Once Magazine will be shared with a lot more photographers and motion shooters than if it just appeared on my blog.  Why all this sharing?  I don’t know, but I do know that when you give, you get more in return and on many levels.

I spent two years, giving seminars for ASMP about transitioning to video.  In those two years, I got a lot of emails with questions from photographers as they added motion to their businesses and I  hope I answered each and everyone.  I’ve also shared a lot of info about video on this blog . That’s why I started it and titled it “Journeys of a Hybrid”, almost 3 years ago – it was a journey for all of us. I’ve recently started offering seminars in The Business of Video, because I see there is a hole to fill. There’s plenty of  “HDSLR” workshops out there, but rarely do any provide practical business models and/or guidance that speaks to the new media opportunities that are opening up in the hybrid area.

Giving seminars doesn’t provide me a living but it does help me in a business sense because by providing knowledge to my competition and people just starting out, I am helping all of us to sustain a decent living, working in a creative trade.

I also like to share because it makes me feel good.  I’ll be speaking at the PACA conference on Oct. 22nd, in New York.  ASPP asked me to talk about my film, Opening Our Eyes in a seminar entitled “Passion to Profitable Distribution”.  I’m delighted to do that because there’s nothing I like doing more than talking about what we as creatives are capable of doing and the global reach we have as individuals.  It’s an empowering time.

I’ll close with one small request and that is to share this link to our recently launched
campaign for Opening Our Eyes on IndieGoGo. The film is finished and is already making a difference, but we need to give it a push in order to “get it out there” and to be seen.

As Marian Kramer, one of our subjects said “We just have to shine each other up.”

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It’s All Connected

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve had numerous experiences where things I’ve done in the past have resurfaced in ways I couldn’t have imagined. Last week blues musician Willie “Big Eyes” Smith passed away. He was one of the only two Delta blues musicians still living who had been part of my first short documentary The Delta Bluesmen. That same week, I had a photograph hanging in an exhibit by the Copyright Alliance, Recording Our History: Faces Behind the Camera, in the Senate building rotunda in our nation’s capitol. It was a portrait of blues drummer Sam Carr, who I had photographed and interviewed for that same project, over ten years ago.

I knew if Sam were alive he would have been humbled and honored,

Gail Mooney with her portrait of blues drummer Sam Carr in Senate Rotunda, Washington DC ©Eugene Mopsik

as was I, to have his portrait displayed in such a historic setting. I couldn’t help but “feel” proud at that moment in time. Sure, I felt proud of myself and Sam but I also felt a sense of pride to live in a country where I could still freely walk the halls of the Senate building, past the offices of the powerful of today and the ghosts from yesterday. I didn’t expect to feel that way. I was surprised and comforted that we still have this kind of access to our representatives.

It got me thinking about the trip I took last summer with my daughter when we left the country for 99 days, shooting Opening Our Eyes. We had circled the globe and had visited countries that crossed the spectrum politically, economically and socially. Our journey truly did open our eyes and when we returned to the U.S., it was a big adjustment. What hit me most was that everyone needed to be right, especially in Washington DC. I couldn’t watch TV for months because all I saw was 500 channels of “experts” pontificating and no one was getting anywhere. Worse yet, we all suffer.  I remember a time, when I was growing up during the Kennedy era and we asked what we could do for others, instead of what we could “gain” for ourselves.

It’s a year later and I still don’t watch much TV. I’ve found myself  absorbed back into the “culture” of America. But as I walked through those venerable halls of the Senate building, I was reminded of my purpose. I’m a storyteller. I voice the stories of people like Sam Carr so that future generations will remember the way things used to be. History gives us perspective and we can learn from it – or not. Without perspective – we can’t remain free.

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Status Quo, Fear and Other Stupid Human Tricks

I went to my town meeting last night. It was a typical “town meeting” where everyone needed to be “right”, and no one was winning. A citizen came up to the mic during the public hearing session and made a statement that really resonated with me. He said “ No one ever wants to change the status quo It’s human nature not to want change. Everyone has their little power centers that they want to hold onto”.

I had a flashback that brought me back to a smoke filled room of dirty dishes with leftover remnants of brown rice and a whole lot of people having the same old discussion of how we all needed to stop “ the War” and change the world. That was almost 40 years ago but I’ll remember like it was yesterday when a “freak” came in and said “Why doesn’t somebody f……. do something? You’re all just sitting around and talking – like the status quo”

Photo Source Mr. Snodgrass

To be honest, I don’t think there is a status quo. Nothing ever stays the same. You either move forward or drop back, but there is no stepping in place. It’s not sustainable. And that’s nothing new – it’s always been true – but never more than today due to the exponential rise in technology. And it has never been more true in regards to the state of the photographic industry. I see so many photographers paralyzed by their own fears of taking a risk and thinking outside their own boxes.

Few people overcome their fear of change and rise to the occasion of “doing something” as opposed to reacting to something. Most plod along, feeling no control over their destiny – letting fate take its course. A lot of photographers are just hoping to “ride it out” until there is nothing left of their businesses.

Every once in a while, somebody makes a bold move and looks at “change” as an opportunity. History proves me right. If you look back through time, you will see a pattern. At the most pivotal times of change – the cream always rises to the top – and the sludge gets left behind – on the bottom.

As far as the photography industry – I think it’s time to decide if we are ready to “embrace” change and rise to the top or die a slow death. But we have to start seeing the opportunities that always come with change.

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The Power of Music on 9/11

Today is a day of remembrance – it’s been 10 years since the Twin Towers came down in NYC, changing the Manhattan skyline and our lives forever.  We all can probably remember exactly where we were and what we were doing that terrible day.

As for me, I not only remember that day vividly, but the weeks that followed, even though I felt like I was living in a daze.  What I remember most was the healing power of music.  In fact, music was one of the few things we humans could let into our hearts and minds to try to begin to soothe our souls and deal with our pain and our fears.

Music is a universal language.  Regardless of where we are in the world, music is one of those things that can still define a culture and a people, even in a world that seems so homogenous in so many other ways.  I think that’s why it resonates with me, it speaks to the place I’m in, even though I may not be able to communicate with words. Music transcends any language and connects us on a deeper more primal level that goes straight to the heart. When I was interviewing blues musician Willie “Big Eyes” Smith, he told me “If you sing me the blues – I know exactly where you’re coming from”.

I think all of us can define moments in our life by a song that we remember.  We have all been exhilarated by music and have danced the night away or conversely been healed by music when it seems like we just can’t make it through the day.  What else has that kind of power?

Today, I will pause and remember that tragic day 10 years ago that changed our lives forever and as I do, I will heal my soul with music. I know if Willie “Big Eyes” could heard me singing the blues today – he’d know exactly where I was coming from.

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