human rights – Journeys of a Hybrid

March 4, 2012March 4, 2012

Paying it Forward – It’s Amazing

I got the best email yesterday. It was from a young man who had attended a seminar I had given at Yale for ASMP on “Should I Be Thinking of Video”. I remember that evening well. I had recently returned from a 3-month journey circling the globe with my daughter creating a documentary on people making a positive difference in the world.
I was still very much in the same head-set that I had been for the past few months – one full of peace and belief in myself. I had just come off an intensive period where I was “walkin’ the walk” and I was practicing what I preached.

The young man, Brian, wrote, that he had attended my seminar with his father, who was a photographer and that he, himself had grown up wanting to make movies. So, my seminar was a perfect combination for them. Then Brian wrote “That night you inspired me.” My heart jumped when I read it. He went on to remind me of things that I had said that evening – about overcoming fears in order to realize your dreams – in my case traveling the world to make a movie. Leaving the known behind – for the unknown. Telling yourself “yes” instead of giving yourself reasons not to.

Brian said that he had recently landed his first job of his career as a structural engineer. He loved it, but he also had a great desire to travel. That night he went home and furiously “googled” anything about traveling the world and beyond. He came across the website of “Engineers Without Borders” and as serendipity would have it, they were having their monthly meeting that week.

To make a long, but interesting story, short, Brian went to that meeting that week, and talked with some people during a break who were organizing a trip to a village in India.

Then they invited him to go with them in February. He was astounded. And then he did the same thing many of us do in similar situations – he started giving himself every rational reason why he shouldn’t/couldn’t possibly do something like this. In Brian’s case – how could he ask his new boss for 3 weeks of time off?

That night when Brian heard me speak, was about a year and a half ago. In the email he sent to me yesterday, he talked about spending the last year editing his 15 hours of footage, down to a 40 minute piece. He told me that it hadn’t been easy and that he frequently read my blog posts where I had written about my similar experiences with post-production – magnified. What I had shared had helped him through it – angst and all.

My favorite line in his email read:

“So, I’m finally done with my movie, although there’s things I wish I had done differently, I did my best and I’m glad it’s finished! The final product is one thing, but the journey to get there is another, and the past 18 months have been such an amazing experience for me! I owe it all to you! Sorry for the long email but I’ve been waiting 18 months to tell you my story!!”

Brian just launched a Kickstarter campaign to send another engineer to Nepal for a similar project. You can find out more about it here: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/videotaping/welcome-to-abheypur-the-movie

I think back on that evening and the year and a half in between. I’ve gone through two tough winters, doing the kind of work that needs to be done, but nevertheless takes its toll on my heart and my soul. That evening, my spirit was alive and well. Brian and others felt it and it moved them to a place they wanted to be. And now, after a tough winter, that same “energy” has come back around to me through Brian’s email. It has reminded me to stay the course and stay on purpose. Thanks Brian.

December 30, 2011

Closing Thoughts and Best of Best

It’s been a very full year for me. I mean that in every sense of the word full – full of new experiences, full of hope, full of achievements – but also full of my share of rejections and disappointments. I’ve shared a lot of these experiences through this blog.

There have been times I haven’t written in a while because I didn’t feel like I’ve had anything worthwhile to say. And there have been times when I did write but I probably shouldn’t have because it wasn’t worth reading. I always told myself that when I didn’t feel like writing in my blog, that I just wouldn’t do it. So if there are long periods of time when I haven’t posted a new entry – it’s because for whatever reason, the desire may not be there. I have always appreciated the comments and feedback.

Here are the top 5 posts as far as number of hits:

My DSLR Kit for a Three-Month Road Trip

Gearing Up With HD DSLR’s

Standing on a 10-Foot Frozen Wave

Putting Together a DSLR Video Kit – and Why

Cultural Context and Photography

As you can see, the blogs about DSLR (for video) gear is where the interest was. But I’d have to say that out of those 5 posts, “Standing on a 10 Foot Frozen Wave” was my favorite. For me, it’s all about the story. And as Orson Welles once said “If you want a happy ending, it depends on where you stop the story”.

Happy New Year everyone.

November 2, 2011November 2, 2011

The Money Game

I’ve learned a lot about the “entertainment” industry in the process of creating our documentary Opening Our Eyes. But I was a bit surprised to learn how one show derives its content. I won’t mention specifics, because I don’t believe that this particular way of doing business is unique to this one show.

A couple of days ago, I received an email from one of the subjects in our film asking for my counsel about a high profile program that is syndicated on various cable channels. The show essentially does short segments on organizations and/or companies that have stories of educational value.

I looked through the electronic info kit that they had sent and it sounded great, because they guaranteed placement for the 5-6 minute piece within the program, which would run on a couple of large cable networks. They also guaranteed a 1- minute spot on CNN and Fox News. Plus the production company would deliver a file ready for web so that an organization could upload it to their site and/or deliver DVD’s to potential funders or clients.

I continued to read the attached PDF’s which listed the production requirements and workflow that would take place if “they” were selected to be profiled. But what stood out and surprised me was the line that stated that a payment of almost $30,000 would be required, if they were chosen to participate. Quite honestly, I was a bit shocked. Here was a production company that was creating a syndicated program and expecting the subjects to finance it.

I’m almost certain that this company also makes a hefty sum from the cable networks who in turn get money from their advertisers. That doesn’t surprise me a bit. But I didn’t know that it had become part of the game to make revenue off the subjects of the stories!

Perhaps that might not sound all that bad because it’s just business in a free economy, but quite honestly it has really changed my thinking about networks that run stories about people, organizations or institutions that have educational value. Now when I watch a show like this, I will question the credibility of the causes and organizations that are being profiled, because I know that this “door to distribution” is only open for those who can pay. And that doesn’t necessarily mean that the stories they run are about the most deserving subjects or even the most compelling stories. It simply means that the people behind these stories had the funds to “pay to play”.

I think back on all the extraordinary people that we met last summer while making our documentary. Most of them would be hard put to find this kind of money and if they did they would probably put it right back into their causes and the people they are trying to help – not a production company that is making money off both ends. I went in the “red” doing this documentary with the hopes that it will cause a shift in the way we think and that it will move people to action to make a difference in the world. I figured that’s the least I could do – use my skills as a storyteller to create a film that would raise awareness and help all our subjects and their programs.
Would I like to make money on this film? I’d be happy if I broke even. I’d be even happier if this film was seen by hundreds of thousands of people. But I wouldn’t dream of charging my subjects money.

Ronni Kahn of Oz Harvest told me “Just go out and do something – not for the money not for the recognition but for the sake of doing”. I suppose that’s exactly what Erin and I did. And that in itself has been the biggest reward of all.

October 23, 2011

Being Yourself

Yesterday, I gave a talk and showed a bit of my film, Opening Our Eyes,

Opening Our Eyes One Sheet Poster 27x40" — Movie poster for Opening Our Eyes

at the PACA conference in New York City. I had been asked by ASPP to speak about the making of the film and my plans for distribution. To tell you the truth, even though I’m always thrilled to show and/or talk about the film, I was a bit nervous with this crowd. PACA stands for the Picture Archive Council of America and its member include some of the biggest stock photo agencies in the world, including Getty, Corbis, Masterfile and Alamy. I was nervous because part of my message was that I no longer needed the validation or others to get my stories to market.

I thought my message would be somewhat threatening, because I was telling the audience that content creators no longer needed the traditional gatekeepers of the past, to get their stories “out there.” That because of technology, it was possible for the individual to have a global reach and if one is willing to do the work – the prize is all theirs – meaning the monetary rewards.

I had a tough time slot to speak – right after lunch – I knew that I would be dimming the lights for the film and that is never a good thing to do in that time slot. But, Tom Kennedy had given his very inspirational talk about new media and new opportunities in the marketplace. I had heard Tom’s talk as part of ASMP’s SB 3 series this past year – and I knew that my presentation was a great follow up to his – and in fact it was almost like a case study example of what Tom was talking about.

My presentation went amazingly well and as I looked out into the dimly lit audience as the film was playing – I couldn’t see any closed eyes. I felt that I made a connection, and that perhaps in some small way, I had made a difference. Maybe, I just got people thinking about what they could do to make a difference in their own lives. And maybe I had influence beyond that. But, I know that I stayed true to myself. My intent was not to come off as threatening – but I did want to make people feel a tiny bit uncomfortable. It’s when we get uncomfortable that we push ourselves to a better place.

My message was simple. Someone doesn’t need to lose – in order for someone else to win.

September 12, 2011September 12, 2011

The Eyes of Our Times

I was looking through my emails and social media posts and I saw something on my Facebook feed that Daymon J. Hartley posted. It was a link to a lightbox of 9/11 images on Time Magazine’s website. It was a collection of images that had run in a variety of magazines and newspapers in the days that followed that tragic event. Along with the images ran comments from the picture editors, why they had chosen that particular image.

As I looked through the images, I was overcome with emotion and moved right back to a very deep place within, remembering the pain, the fear and disbelief of what happened that day. This time I looked at the images online. Ten years ago I first saw these photographs in print publications. Regardless of how I saw these images, in print or electronically – the effect was still the same.

It reminded me of how powerful our photographs and videos are. We are the eyes of our times, the ones to document history. We not only record history in imagery, sound and motion, but we have the power to create the future. History has been rewritten by imagery. Take the Civil Rights Movement in the 1960’s in America. Photographs created awareness of what was happening in the South and put the eyes of the world upon us. That forced change.

As photojournalists and video journalists and non-professionals as well, we need to realize the power of what we do and the influence it can make. It’s a responsibility I take seriously. I feel that it’s not just my duty to document history as it unfolds, but it’s my right to do so as well. These days those rights are being questioned in some places. We need to be diligent in keeping those rights in America. Isn’t that what makes our country different?

As we race towards a destination unknown with technology quickening the pace – let’s be mindful who is controlling the portals of the future – so that future generations can learn from the past.

August 22, 2011

Somebody Should Do Something

Have you ever been in a situation or with a group of people when something is being discussed and someone says “somebody should do something”? It could be anything from a local school with a bully problem to helping victims of conflicts happening on the other side of the world. I hear that phrase too frequently. I used to say it myself. But the fact is the “somebody” is each one of us.

It seems like everyone is waiting for someone else to do something. There are some days it seems like people are in a stalled mood – everyone kind of waiting to “fix” things. There’s a lot of talk – the pundits on TV – the politicians – the short term capitalists – but nothing seems to be getting done.

I think people are basically “stuck” right now because everyone seems to be looking for that “one” perfect solution. We are so accustomed to thinking that way in our “made for TV culture” we overlook the ordinary simple things we all could be doing.

I’ve had a bit of a shift in my life over the last couple of years where I’ve really started being more conscious of my own actions and how those actions can affect my circle of influence. Just little things – but I know that the way to achieve any big goal is to break it down into little steps. One little thing I recently did was to design a simple cardboard DVD jacket for my film, rather than the traditional plastic case that DVD’s are packaged in. Committed people in grass roots groups like the Plastic Pollution Coalition, made me aware of the huge problem with plastics and our environment.

The thing I realize though is that “doing something” – anything – is better than waiting for someone else to make things right. It feels good and it’s addictive. It’s probably one of the few addictive things that are beneficial. And it’s empowering.

Go out and create your day.

August 6, 2011

Authenticity

It’s a humid, Saturday morning in the dog days of summer. There’s a dozen things I should be doing – paying the bills, doing the laundry, filling out film festival submissions and catching up on the endless little details that have consumed me with my film.

And yet, I write. I started writing about 7 years ago when I would wake up super early in the morning with my mind spinning with ideas and not allowing me to turn over and go back to sleep. So, I ‘d get out of bed and write about whatever was running through my mind at the time and I would put those thoughts out there in my blog. Colleen Wainwright is running a whole series of interviews with writers on her blog as part of a fund raiser and I was honored to be included.

In the beginning, I got a lot of encouragement from a friend who gave me the confidence to write more and I did. Some days the words would just pour out of me and many times, I’d see them quoted later in other people’s blogs and I couldn’t believe that I had written them – almost like an out of body experience. Now, writing has become a habit and a way for me to organize my thoughts and turn chaos into order and thus my dreams into realities.

Many people tell me that I’m incredibly open and honest. I’ve always found that interesting – the fact that was something to comment on – but at the same time feeling very flattered. If someone tells me that I’m the “real deal”, that’s about as high of a compliment that one can give me.

If “authenticity” comes across in my writing or in the visuals that I create, then I think that I’m must be doing something right, because I use my words and my images to connect with people and that really only happens when I’m being true to myself. I think people can sense that – it’s not something you can fake. You’re either genuine – or you’re not.

To be honest, because I am “genuine” and tend to “tell it like it is” – it has been a blessing and a curse – but I can’t seem to help myself. I’m a sucker for a good cause and I’m one to always strive for consensus as opposed to “getting my way” or motivated by a personal agenda. When, I’m on purpose and not driven by ego – good things happen – and like-minded people are “attracted” to me like little magnets in the universe.

Now, I’ll go do the laundry.

July 23, 2011July 24, 2011

More Stuff I Learned While Making a Movie

The day finally arrived – our first screening of Opening Our Eyes – a film that I have poured my heart and soul into over the last year and a half. Sounds like a cliché, but this project has consumed me in every way imaginable – good and bad.

As I looked up at the marquee of the State Theater in Traverse City, MI last Sunday morning, it hit me – we had done it. My daughter Erin and I had set out to make a film last Spring about people all over the world who were making it a better place – and we did it.

It was and will continue to be a lot of work – a lot more than I ever could have imagined. There have been some of the lowest of lows and the highest of highs along the way. There have been times of disappointment from unexpected sources and times of encouragement and support from remarkable people who came into my life because of this project.

I have learned so much since embarking on this journey – here are just a few things:

Believe in your dream. Lots of us have dreams but most of us don’t really believe in them. I think that makes all the difference as far as making your dream a reality – the ability to believe that your dream will happen. I have felt that this would happen from the first moment that I conceived the idea – I saw it – I heard it – This idea picked me – not the other way around.

Trust – I knew all along that for this film to be what I had envisioned it to be – I couldn’t do it alone. It could only succeed through the support of all the people who have contributed to this project from the beginning, whether by supporting it financially or just by being there for me to spring ideas off of. I really had to open myself up and trust that would happen – and it did. That’s not to say that I haven’t had my share of disappointments along the way, but I had to get past them and then learn to trust – again.

Work with people who share your vision. I used to think I could edit. but after working with my brilliant editor, Erik Freeland – now I just think I’m a hack. Finding Erik was a blessing. It’s not all that hard to find a good editor, but to find an editor who has the same drive and passion as I do for what this film is or can be – is a rare gift – and I know that. There have been a handful of times in my life, when this serendipity has happened and sometimes, I’ve been too busy to take notice – but this time, I not only took notice – I welcomed Erik’s vision. Because I was open to what Erik could bring to the film – it’s so much stronger.

Friends – As much as I know that I should never do anything for the sake of other people’s approval, there is always a part of me (my ego) that surfaces and seeks that approval or validation. Funny thing is that when you create something that is coming from such a sincere place in your own heart – a project that you’re so passionate about – people come into your life because of it. They are drawn in by your own enthusiasm. So when others, disappoint you or even take no notice at all – you realize their approval doesn’t really matter.
Chris Guillebeau has a wonderful blog post about this.

Feedback – One reason I had a couple of sneak previews this past week was to solicit feedback. When I get consumed with the mechanics of making a movie, especially the editing of the movie, I often get caught up in the nit picky stuff, (which is very important) but I need to step back and digest it as the overall movie. It’s tough when I’m so close to it, so I always solicit other’s input. I know I can’t accommodate everyone’s suggestions because I’d end up with a big mess if I tried. Some comments ring true and I may take them to heart, while other comments aren’t really along the same line of my thinking, so I discount them. Some people’s comments are brutal and cut deep, but after I get past the initial hurt, I realize sometimes, that the comments that cut deepest are the one’s that strike closest to the heart of the matter – and my inner voice takes notice.

Overcoming resistance – The most important thing of all. I did what I set out to do and that is to make a film that will motivate others and move them to action. During the first Q&A last week, a man stood up and thanked me for making the film. He told me that he hadn’t even intended to see a movie that morning – he had been looking at the posters announcing the lineup for the TC film festival this week and saw the marquee and came in. He told me that it changed his way of thinking – that it changed his life. And then he told me that I needed to screen this film for as many people as possible. That’s my ultimate goal – to share this film with others – and if one person in every audience reacts that way – well what more could I ask for?

This film may not be perfect and it may not be for everybody (certainly not the cynics), but I did something a lot of others never do – I executed my idea – rather than give myself lots of goods reasons why I couldn’t. I could cite plenty of reasons right now that could have or should have stopped me in my tracks. But I didn’t stop because I had such a strong belief in this dream – I saw it too clearly.

Whenever I pull back from my dreams and succumb to my own resistance, I stop and think about a line from a Joni Mitchell tune where she writes about old friends being “cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark café”. I stop and I think about that. I sure don’t want to end up being one of those people who piss away their own life by passing judgment about other people’s efforts or causes. And then, I get out and do something. That’s how I’m making a difference.

June 23, 2011

The NON Convergence of Still Photography and Video

Many people, myself included have written about the convergence of stills and video. In fact ever since Vincent LaFloret paved the way, shooting video in a cinematic way with the Canon Eos 5D Mark II, it seems like every still photographer wants to shoot video with a DSLR . At the same time, high end “video cameras” – not still cameras that also shoot video – but a high end camera like the RED is capable of capturing stunning stills from frame grabs and they aren’t just good enough – they’re great.

I suppose in this sense one could argue that there is not only a convergence of our tools – meaning a camera that is capable of shooting high quality video and still images – but that it also may mean – the end of still photography. I don’t have a crystal ball but if one defines a still image as a “moment in time” then still photography will never go away. If you have a camera that shoots hi res video and can pick and choose the exact frame that fits your still image needs – then we need to realize that this is a convergence of our “tools” not the the end of creating still imagery.

I love to point out the differences of still photography and video because for me, and many others who shoot both still photographs and video, we think differently when shooting these mediums.

A still image is a moment in time.
Video is time in motion
A still image is one that is meant to linger on – where one can take pause
Motion imagery is made up of a variety of shots and sequences
Video provides more information – there’s sound and movement
Still images leave more for viewer interpretation
Still images deliver a message visually
Video delivers a message utilizing sight and sound

Everyone of these differences requires us to put our minds in a different place. When shooting video, I need to think about what shot will come before and what shot will come after the shot I’m about to shoot. I have to think that way or I won’t have the goods to cut with in the editing room. The message or story gets crafted further in post production with music and interviews and each element plays its part in the feel and arc of the story.

When I’m shooting still images, I must tell the story in that one frame and timing is everything – it’s the “decisive moment”. So, one must ask is it the same – is it even fair – to grab that “moment in time” from a video clip where the camera operator didn’t make a conscious decision when shooting that decisive moment ?

The point is with everyone talking about “convergence” and taking that to mean the demise of still photography – I have to wonder. Is it the end of still photography? Personally, I don’t think so. I think that it merely means a convergence of the tools – not what we create with those tools.

June 17, 2011June 17, 2011

The Making of a Movie with a DSLR

It’s been a wild ride since I first began this journey of making a feature film with a DSLR camera – in my case, the Canon Eos 5D Mark II. I had already completed three short documentaries to date – all made with traditional video cameras from my first Canon XL-1 to my current HD Sony EX-1. But this time I was heading out on a 99-day journey around the globe, with my 23 year old daughter in search of ordinary people on six continents, who were making a difference in the world, and we had to pack light.

We were “the crew” – the two of us. We had to work efficiently and with gear that would fit into two backpacks and would endure the adventure as we traveled to 17 different countries on 30 flights. I also wanted to shoot both still images and motion, so I opted for the DSLR solution. Of course, I was enchanted by the “big chip” and the cinematic look of these cameras, but I was also thinking of my gear in practical terms – how I was traveling – how I would be shooting – and of course the desired outcome.

So with my daughter “running sound”, doing the interviews with our subjects, shooting still images, and navigating us through the subway systems in Moscow and Buenos Aires, and me taking care of all the logistics and shooting both video and stills, we came back 99 days later with almost 3000 gigabytes of content – that’s approx. 150 hours of footage and 5000 still image captures!

I wasn’t mentally prepared for what came next and that was 2 intensive months on my part ingesting all the content into my editing system, transcoding and adding metadata to the files and culling through hours of interview soundbites until I had cut it down to three . It was grueling and my winter months were spent putting in 14 hour days – 7 days a week. I was overwhelmed, yet somehow driven by some force. It was a lot of work, it was tedious and it was daunting – but yet it was my passion and somehow this inexplicable “force” got me through it.

I raised money along the way through crowd funding on Kickstarter and with that, I hired an editor. After I handed the project off to my editor, Erik Freeland of Springhouse Films, there was a huge sigh of relief on my part. I knew the post production had a long way to go but, I also knew that I had to let it go for a while and step back. Working with Erik has been amazing in itself and he has brought enormous value to this project and film. I have learned a lot from his insights and his talents in knowing how to” tell a story”, and we are finally coming to the completion of this film. Or at least in getting the “first cut” done for a sneak preview on July 17th, at the State Theater in Traverse City, Michigan. The screening is by invitation only and if you would like to attend, just drop me an email at gail@openingoureyes.net and tell me how many people would like to attend.

Since I first dreamed up this project in the final days of 2009, to the departure of our trip in the Spring of 2010, to where we are now, it has been a continual journey on every level imaginable. And I have had many angels working on my behalf – my husband Tom Kelly who has been the “wind beneath my wings” and without his support none of this would have been possible, my extended family who have been amused over the years with my schemes and dreams, my dear friends Angel Burns and Ally Raye who have believed in me and this project and have made incredibly exciting things happen for this film. (I’m not quite ready to divulge some of those exciting things publicly, just yet), Maria Grillo and Jason Harvey at The Grillo Group who have been so giving with their time and talents and created all the graphic design for the film’s release, and so many other “angels” who have helped me with foreign translations, been financial backers, helped me spread the word globally, and every person who was there for me when I needed support and encouragement. I am deeply grateful to have all these people in my life.

We live in an empowering time. When I began my career as a still photographer, over 30 years ago, I never would have imagined doing any of this. In fact just two years ago, none of this would have been possible. Our dreams are as big as we want them to be. I have seen this dream clearly from the start and each day I get closer and closer to seeing it become a reality.

Watch the Trailer

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